Triskaidekaphilia. Def: “a word you cut and paste and never, ever attempt to spell.”

Upon first glance the photo above might appear to be some angry service station attendant pouring a vile green liquid onto the windshield of a hapless patron, but a closer inspection reveals it to be the mad genius Scoats, who invented the Grey Lodge Pub to get out of his terrible insurance company job in anticipation of health care reform which might inspire somebody to check into what the hell he was doing, which leads us to the realization that those are good, fresh hops he’s pouring out and, given his inclination, we can only assume that this has something to do with beer.

Which brings us to Triskaidekaphilia, for which we and our spell-check software will never forgive him, trust me.

Only a fool would try to explain this. Fortunately, Scoats has apparently hired same and thus was able to send along this news release. Read with care. There will be a test.

The Grey Lodge Pub, Northeast Philadelphia’s semi-world famous beer bar and restaurant, is celebrating its 13th anniversary on August 15, 2009. As part of the festivities, The Grey Lodge has teamed up with Dock Street Brewery to create Triskaidekaphilia Dunkel Weisse. The name (hopefully) translates as “love of the number 13”, which is The Grey Lodge’s lucky number. Friday the Firkinteenth, The Grey Lodge Pub’s internationally known cask ale event takes place every Friday the 13th. The number 13 also ties into many other Grey Lodge events and promotions.

Scoats requested a chocolaty dark wheat beer and Ben Potts, head brewer at Dock Street, delivered. Ben drew up the grain bill and once the recipe was hammered down, the two collaborators got brewing. Triskaidekaphilia Dunkel Weisse was brewed using German Hallertauer Tradition hops and some of the finest imported malts including malted wheat from Germany, caramel malts from France, and a dash of English chocolate malt. It was then fermented with a unique Hefeweizen yeast strain.

Technically, the beer was brewed with 13 different ingredients – 8 different malts, 1 hop variety, water, yeast, yeast nutrient, and Irish moss. The beer also had an original gravity of 13 (well, closer to 12.8 or so, but close enough!). The result is, well, just what Scoats asked for – a dark wheat beer with a huge nose of bananas and chocolate backed up by spicy clove notes. The flavor follows suit: chocolate covered bananas with caramel up front followed by delicate layers of cinnamon-clove spice and subdued herbal hops lingering into the finish. Final ABV clocks in at 5% alcohol. This limited one-off brew will be available both at The Grey Lodge Pub and Dock Street Brewery and Restaurant starting August 15th while supplies last – about 8 or 9 kegs for both locations.

In order to properly kick off the 13th Anniversary, The Grey Lodge will be holding the Dock Street Triskaidekaphilia Wurst Breakfast at 11am on Saturday Aug. 15th. A Philadelphia take on a Munich tradition, The Grey Lodge will be serving a .5 liter of Dock Street Triskaidekaphilia Dunkel Weisse, with two sausages, and a Philly soft pretzel for one low price. Following that will be 12 other Grey Lodge events. 13 events in 13 hours? Triskaidekaphilia .

That certainly clears things up. Or, if not, this should help.

You do understand that this man is one of our city’s leading publicans, right? Beers with unpronounceable names and hourly beer events are a matter of course for him.

Still, the following is somewhat problematic.

Get the feeling that you’ve been stuffed into a barrel and a lot of people are enjoying your discomfort?

I suggest you make your way to the Grey Lodge Pub on August 15 and register an official complaint with the management.

You might want to yell “Wolverines!”

Or maybe “Triskaidekaphilia!”

Good luck with that.

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