America is doomed. And it’s Lew Bryson’s fault.

I’ll leave it to Big Fella to eviscerate these fools at the top of his virtual lungs. He be good at that.

Although, come to think of it, there’s actually nobody to eviscerate. It’s an AP story—remember when they were a really good news service?—and four Houston yahoos, plus an anonymous editor in the mix, but nobody to really yell at. I have faith in Lew; he’ll find somebody.

It’s as funny as it is dumb though, most especially the comments. Be sure to read all four (or more if more there be by the time you visit). This is my favorite:

Someone I know .. got to be always drunk before noon .. he lost his farm .. the equipment .. a sweet wife .. most of his friends .. and is now living with his drunk girl friend.

I fear for our nation.

Clearly the sudden wave of beer breakfasts sweeping America will soon result in abandoned farms, wives turned sour and entirely too much drunken fornication with drunken partners.

And just imagine if our top executives in the financial and banking worlds start acting like drunken sailors…

Oh, wait.

Thanks to new regular Commenter Pete LaVerghetta for finding the story and Scoats, each of them up all too early on the first morning after the first evening of Philly Beer Week, for passing it on.

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